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Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts at disabling
the security system got underway immediately. The robbers, who expected
to find one or two large safes filled with cash and valuables, were
surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout the
bank. The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside they
found only a bowl of vanilla pudding.
As recorded on the bank's audiotape system, one robber said, "At least
we'll have a bit to eat."
The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also contained nothing
but vanilla pudding. The process continued until all the safes were
opened. They found not one pound sterling, a diamond, or an ounce of
gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding.
Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving with nothing
more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach. The newspaper
headline read:
IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING
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Ya'll come back now, ya here...
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