|
|
Home |
Photography |
Comedy |
Music |
Wisdom |
Other |
|
|
1. It takes 116 muscles to climax, but only 17 to smile.
2. Sex makes you alert and ready to face the world. . . it's an ideal
substitute for a hot breakfast.
3. The greater the orgasm, the deeper the sleep.
Multiple orgasms (20
or more per hour) can induce a coma and
near-fusion with the mattress.
4. Eat and drink sensibly. The combination of
alcohol and sex,
especially after long abstinence, can cause
spontaneous
fizzle.
5. Improved breath control increases oxygen supply
throughout entire
body, prevents asphyxiation during mighty kisses,
trims and tones pelvis, promotes a stronger upper
body enabling you
to hold on tight and keep partner from damaging
furniture during moments of ecstacy.
6. Better coordination prevents confusion during
intricate
manipulations, permitting you to talk and perform at
the same
time.
7. A single ejaculation, especially from a man,
contains enough sperm cells to fertilize every woman in the Marines.
8. Oral sex is a great way to firm the lower face.
9. After 16 steady hours of sex, it is wise to check
your insurance
policy.
10. "Where am I?" should not be considered an abnormal response to
immense orgasm.
11. Men who experience difficulty with insertion should see a guidance
counselor.
12. Too much arousal can bring on a hard-attack.
13. It's perfectly okay
to have sex on an empty stomach, especially if it belongs to your
partner.
14. You know that you've had too much sex when your life begins to flash
before your eyes.
15. You know you've had too little sex when my partner begins to flash
before my eyes.
16. Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and in
demand.
17. Good sex can correct poor posture, or at least make it stand up
straight.
18. Thirty percent of our body heat escapes through the head (wear a hat
during sex).
19. Sex on an inclined surface (an anthill, for example) builds
endurance.
20. The length of an orgasm is usually anywhere from three to eleven
seconds or four to seven feet.
21. 1970 FDA approves spray-on Vaseline.
22. To prevent bedsores, oil the sheets.
23. Maintenance tip for
massages: change the oil every 10,000 strokes.
24. Sexual survival depends on knowing the difference between a birthmark
and a rash.
25. The newlyweds left the sex therapist's office
determined to develop
more effective body language. "OK," the husband
said, "when I want sex, I'll rub your right
breast. When I don't
want sex, I'll rub your left breast. " "Fine," his
bride replied,
"but what about me?" "When you want sex, rub my
johnson once. When
you don't want sex, rub my johnson five
hundred times. "
|
|
|
|
|
Original Content Copyright © 1995-. All rights reserved.
Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission is prohibited.
|
|
|
|
|
Ya'll come back now, ya here...
|
|
|
|