These speak for themselves

smoking kills, and if you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
- anti-smoking spokesperson brooke shields

we are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur.
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle

the president has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
- clinton aide george stephanopolous speaking on larry king live

the police are not here to create disorder, they're here to preserve disorder
- former chicago mayor daley during the infamous 1968 convention

if you've seen one redwood tree, you've seen them all
- forestry expert ronald reagan

traditionally, most of australia's imports come from overseas
- former australian cabinet minister keppel enderbery

it is wonderful to be here in the great state of chicago
- former u.s.. vice-president dan quayle

the streets are safe in philadelphia, it's only the people that make them unsafe
- former philadelphia mayor and police chief frank rizzo

the internet is a great way to get on the net
- republican presidential candidate bob dole

it is bad luck to be superstitious
- andrew mathis

he was a man of great statue
- boston mayor thomas menino on former mayor john collins

it's like an alcatraz around my neck
- boston mayor menino on the shortage of city parking spaces

i was recently on a tour of latin america, and the only regret i have was that i didn't study latin harder in school so i could converse with those people
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle

they're multipurpose. not only do they put the clips on, but they take them off.
- pratt & whitney spokesperson explaining why the company charged the air force nearly $1000 for an ordinary pair of pliers.

we're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.
- jason kidd, upon his drafting to the dallas mavericks

i'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. we are the president.
- hillary clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents

when more and more people are thrown out of work, unemployment results.
- former u.s. president calvin coolidge

it's like deja vu all over again.
- yogi berra

china is a big country, inhabited by many chinese
- former french president charles de gaulle

the loss of life will be irreplaceable.
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle on the san francisco earthquake

that lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and i'm just the one to do it.
- a congressional candidate in texas

it is necessary for me to establish a winner image. therefore, i have to beat somebody.
- richard m. nixon

the government is not doing enough about cleaning up the environment. this is a good planet.
- mr. new jersey contestant when asked what he would do with a million dollars.

when i have been asked during these last weeks who caused the riots and the killing in l.a., my answer has been direct and simple: who is to blame for the riots? the rioters are to blame. who is to blame for the killings? the killers are to blame.
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle on the complex social issues behind the los angeles riots

things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
- former u.s. president dwight d. eisenhower

a billion here, a billion there, sooner or later it adds up to real money.
- senator everett dirksen

a verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.
- samuel goldwyn

republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle on republican family values

i don't feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from them. there were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves.
- john wayne

half this game is ninety percent mental.
- philadelphia phillies manager danny ozark

it isn't pollution that's harming the environment. it's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle

without censorship, things can get terribly confused in the public mind.
- general william westmoreland

what a waste it is to lose one's mind. or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. how true that is.
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle at a fundraising event for the united negro college fund. he was attempting to quote the line a mind is a terrible thing to waste.

if you let that sort of thing go on, your bread and butter will be cut right out from under your feet.
- former british foreign minister ernest bevin

i love california. i practically grew up in phoenix.
- former u.s. vice-president dan quayle

what a bunch of morons.
- jim talmadge

Ya'll come back now, ya here...